That’s the exact opposite of how things are supposed to be.

Now that things are slowly creeping back to normalcy, as Bama proved me wrong and found a way to lose to the cursed Florida State Seminoles coming off a heartbreak loss to Georgia (the game was almost a perfect clone of our game against South Florida) and Auburn showing why you never bet against them in a big game as they put a hurtin’ on Florida. I admit that I was initially surprised that Auburn didn’t crack the top 25 this week, but after about a minute of logical thought, I guess the rest of the world doesn’t forget a loss to Mississippi State as quickly as we do. If Auburn plays the way they did on Saturday against Florida for the rest of the season… I’m getting dangerously and ‘Bammerously’ (new word) ahead of myself.

Anyways, since the ‘rebuilding’ portion of Auburn’s season was cut about 9 weeks short, I’ve had time to reflect and understand what it’s like to be behind a team that’s going through rough times. You learn a lot about humility and learn to appreciate being classy and respectful toward other fans, including fans of your rivals, during those trying times. So in light of these reflections, I’m going to take the high road and list off a few of the now ironic letters I’ve received from Bammers (spelling and grammatical errors left uncensored):

Ryan, you are one of the worst football forcasters I have ever seen. You missed badly on South Florida and Miss. State. You picked the barn to win both of those games and even pick them to beat Florida. Are you nuts? The barn will be lucky to win 3 more games this season. You need to find another profession.
Mary

Ha ha ha! Have you ever watched a football game?
Jason

You Suck! Roll Tide1
Dwight

Far fewer mistakes? Where is that bandwagon of fans now? Great predictions buddy. Maybe you should quit while you're ahead...Go BULLS! RTR
James

We wouldn’t be the greatest rivalry in the country if each of us didn’t kick the other when they were down. I can’t blame the Bammers for getting excited when they finally got to take a few shots at the king. I think it’s cute. Enough petty ‘Bammering,’ let’s talk about something less depressing than Alabama football.

I took the long road trip down to the swamp with a few of my dearest friends: Randy, Meredith, and Kacie. We were forewarned of how intense The Swamp is, and how Urban Meyer has yet to lose in the famed stadium. I was upset to hear most of this from (the few, but still existent) unfaithful Auburn fans, some of whom had lost hope in Auburn’s chances against the almighty Florida and God’s gift to man: Tim Tebow, whose butt is completely covered in ESPN’s lipstick. Did you know that when Tim Tebow isn’t on the field destroying defenses with his multidimensional offensive attack, he heals the blind and gives birth to his own father. I’m sure he really is a great guy, but I have the right… nay, the responsibility to have a stubborn grudge against Tebow as long as he is still taking snaps at Florida. After that, I’ll give him a chance (I actually kind of like Matt Leinart now… don’t tell anyone).

The Swamp lived up to its reputation. You have to give it to the Florida fans, who were just as loud when we were spanking them in the second quarter as when they were slowly mounting a comeback in the fourth quarter. Though the fans don’t show up until about thirty minutes before the game, the Florida fans were behind their team full throttle from kickoff to the final whistle. The stadium was deafening the entire game. The stadium itself is a pretty awesome place, it’s old-school in a very good way. Everything was Gator Orange and Blue.

So in the hours leading up to the game, my fellow friends and I were wandering about campus when we crossed paths with another group of Auburn fans, in which one of them yelled “Hey, it’s that guy from The Auburner!” and their whole group cheered. I leaned over to my friend Meredith and I said “What did they say?” She said, “They said ‘That’s the guy from The Auburner.’ They were talking about Randy.” I was furious. Which leads me to my next point: I obviously don’t promote my own image enough on this website, or far more likely, I simply promote Randy in a positive light too much, whom you will recognize from our Stop Motion videos. But you will no longer remember him for that. You will from here on out recognize him as “Randy: That Guy Who Sucks.” Allow me to create a very brief Anti-Randy Shrine:

So the next time you see this guy, go up to him and say “Hey Randy, you suck!” We don’t need him stealing any more of my glory. I’m a writer on the internet! The game ball goes to: ESPN Gameday. Our guys played their hearts out and proved to the world that they still have the spark to get things done even against the best, but the game was decided at 11:00 that morning when Corso, Herbstreit, and Holtz all picked Florida to win by a blowout. Since I’ve been a student at Auburn, I don’t think that Auburn has lost a game in which Gameday picked against us. The nail was in the coffin before any of the players even put on their pads.

Quote of the day? When asked “So, does Auburn have a chance at all to win this game?” Lou Holtz said “About the same chance of me being the Senator of Florida.” Let the campaign begin!

How about our boys doing everything right that they’ve been doing wrong all year (save a couple of fumbles)? Brandon Cox threw everything on point, handled pressure like a champ, kept his composure in a ferocious environment… maybe he’s like one of those samurais whose senses are actually their weakness? Maybe through the loss of hearing in a deafening stadium, Brandon Cox’s vision is enhanced and makes him a better quarterback? No one pulls through better in big games on the road than B.C. Our receivers caught EVERYTHING. Our defense didn’t miss a tackle. We played beautifully. And then there’s Wes Byrum, a true freshmen doing what NFL kickers couldn’t do: beat the cheap last second freezer timeout and kick two winning field goals. Our coaches are the best in the league. I have always loved Tubs and Borges, they’ve pulled us through some great years and molded more NFL talent than Auburn has in decades. They somehow managed to make me admire them even more Saturday.

Al Borges picked the Florida defense apart, and took advantage of every hole in the defense with an Auburn offense that was ranked nearly 100th in the nation. Then Tubs laid down the freakin’ law on that ref. I rewatched the game on TV, and they cut out about half of Tubs getting all over the refs and throwing his headset. I have never seen Tubs get upset like that, and what a time to do so. I seriously thought he was going to punch that ref in the face. Don’t you ever doubt Tubs passion and fire for this team… ever. He turned what should have been a devastating B.S. call in favor of the other team which could have doomed us all, into the fire our defense needed to take back the game. Our D came out in flames after that call. And then there’s Muschamp, who is like a crack addict, but instead of crack, he is insanely addicted for beastly defense. The guy sweats more than any player out on the field, he’s insane! That’s why our defense is so great this season, they take a bit of that insanity onto the field. War Eagle! E-mail Ryan at ryan@theauburner.com Auburn football tickets (sponsor)