|
Mark
4-2-07
| I’ve
heard various accounts from older people saying when Sputnik was launched;
it was visible at night with the naked eye from the ground. There’s
a scene of it in the movie ‘October Sky’. One of my history
professors claimed to have seen this when he was a kid. Even my dad said
he saw it. However, I have a hard time believing this since Sputnik was
the size of a basketball. So, in true internet blog fashion, instead of doing research on the matter - I’m going to immediately claim conspiracy theory on this one and assume that people couldn’t see Sputnik from the ground with the naked eye. All of those old people are liars in my book now. In the same respect, here are some other things old people are wrong about; |
 |
Sean Connery was the greatest Bond.
They try very hard to drill this one into our heads. Sean Connery was awesome in The Rock and The Last Crusade, but I never understood the fuss over his Bond movies. I think he looked like a monkey back then, and I don’t consider a gun inside an umbrella as a huge technological advance. I assume people hold the old Bond movies in high regard out of nostalgia, but that doesn’t mean they’re better.
Pat Dye (or Shug Jordan) was Auburn’s greatest coach
No disrespect to Dye or Jordan, but Tommy Tuberville is Auburn’s greatest coach. No contest. Dye and Jordan were coaching clichés. Tommy Tuberville doesn’t carry this image – he’s like a cross between an evil CEO, Mother Theresa and a ninja. The overall winning percentages speak for themselves – not to mention the whole Alabama thing. Actually, I will mention it. Tuberville is 6-2 against Alabama. The guy the field is named after went 6-6 and the guy the stadium is named after went 9-16.
Jordan gave Auburn a national presence. Dye added to that presence and brought the Iron Bowl to Auburn. Tuberville took over a program in shambles and has since turned them into such a national powerhouse that whenever it’s discovered that Auburn offers an easy class, The New York Times runs a story on the front page about it. If that doesn’t prove you’re a national power, I don’t know what does. Well. Maybe national championships would – but other that that? Nothing.
English units are better than the metric system
I love America. I’m no hippie communist liberal Nancy Pelosi fan, but it’s time for America to cut and run when it comes to the war on units of measure. America is now the only industrialized country which hasn’t officially adopted the metric system. I know, I know, the French came up with it – but it works. Conversion tables can be annoying. Uhh… we can still keep yards for football.
The original was much better than the remake.
Maybe the original was more ground breaking for its time. Maybe the original’s storyline was more pertinent to the time. However, for every movie and remake I’ve seen, the remake was far more enjoyable. 2005’s King Kong was way better than the 1930’s King Kong and don’t let anyone tell you the original War of the Worlds was superior to the Tom Cruise edition. Heck, this video of Tommy Tuberville singing a cover of Celine Dion’s “Because You Loved Me” is better than the original War of the Worlds. Explosions and people being vaporized trump aliens which look like vacuum cleaners.
Seriously, if
you know how a satellite that small can reflect enough light to be seen from
the ground – let me know. It's been bothering me for a while.
e-mail Mark at
mark@theauburner.com
